Things have been crazy around here. Trying to get ready for school has me in this almost bizarre state. The past 3 weeks I have written at least 40 co-op lesson plans for 5 different grade levels (that's real easy), planned & organized a supply list for 51 children of over $500 worth of art supplies, spent hours talking to other moms about them joining co-op (and figuring out how we could possibly squeeze in just ONE MORE family), and helped with a million other details regarding schedule, classrooms, etc. I have met with the pastor, met with the coordinator, and moderated about a bazillion emails. My brain is still spinning and somewhere in all of that we planned, organized, and started our own school & cleaning schedule on the 15th. Prior to that, every day was filled with what only God can remember. I feel like my brain has been crunched a million times. "Are we having fun yet?" keeps ringing in my mind.
We have attended countless birthday parties this month. The kids had two today. I really lost count. Praise the Lord sometime in the spring I had purchased about $100 worth of gifts for only $20. Still they have not all been appropriate, so we have spent countless hours at the mall or where ever purchasing Webkinz.
Between co-op, school, pre-marital counseling, small group, budgeting, and running I am spent. And I feel like the worst daughter ever. I haven't seen my parents at all since the beginning of summer. I haven't even seen any family since then. I feel out of touch...not right somehow. And I keep messing up. Everything I do feels like a mess up. It's one of those times in your life when you feel like you can never do anything right. I feel stressed and just want to relax. I cannot possibly juggle all of these balls I have picked up. And I so desperately want to open the acrobat trunk, drop the balls in, and walk away. And then I hear God say, "Don't lose heart. Take My yoke upon you for My burden is easy; My burden is light." If I could just figure out how to unstrap the one I'm carrying around.
Do you know I've had a library book OVERDUE for over a month. OVERDUE. That means I've had it for 6 weeks! I might as well buy the stupid thing.
Saturday, August 23, 2008
Fully Spent
Posted by tpot at 4:44 PM
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2 comments:
Don't lose heart. I know it feels like you are all alone trying to swim upstream in your life right now, but remember that God is with you every bit of the way. You are such a blessing to him. He created that wonderful organized mind of yours and he will not let you drown in all that is around you. I hope you are getting some help from the other home schoolers, too. You should all be a bit crazy right now. Share the love!
Hang in there. Believe me, one day you will look back on these crazy, exhausting days as the best of your life. And I agree with Tammie--all other home schoolers are in your boat--going crazy, too. It will get better--and listen to your own heart and let God carry it...and you. I am sure you are doing a great job. And about the library book......there is a wing of the MF library purchased with all my fines. Overdue books seem to run in our family....And remember, we all love you and think you are awesome and amazing.
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